Category Archives: forgiveness
Today’s lesson is on how to deal with ugly behavior – ugly behavior breeds uglier responses. It’s almost like seeing a person get possessed by a demon – the demons ultimate goal is to possess you. Through another persons weakness you become the target to fall lower than he did. In response to an ugly action, we perceive the person in front of us for an enemy…
I wanted to also mention the same tactic that Devil used in Hitlers times during Holocaust. By dehumanizing people their spirit was targeted at the very core, as they clung to the last threads of sanity, they watched faith die….And with faith destroyed, it was an easy task for the Grim Reaper to claim lost souls.
So what is the right way to deal with peoples ugliness? My answer to that, when you are faced with a Demon, (I say symbolically that you are faced with a demon, when you can’t recognize the person you know and love) you can kill him with a skill/tactic I call CPC. The key to this tactic is:
1.REMEMBER WHO YOU ARE!
How you act represents you, always. How you act under pressure however , represents who you truly are at your very core. It is your true essence. If you were a lemon, under the pressure a lemon juice would pour out.
2.Remember who the offender is.
So with this in mind the CPC method would work like this;
1.Begin with a Yes, I understand.
2.AND … You are a reasonable, kind person.
(Insert a Compliment stating the good qualities of the person. The qualities that aren’t showing at the moment. )
3.BUT I am …a person who should be treated with respect .
(Insert a Program, an instruction manual on how you expect to be treated)
4. AND THEREFORE a bright person like you will find a worthy companion in no time.
(Insert another Compliment about some positive trait in this person).
Thus you have not succumbed to this demons trap to fall to his level or lower…Instead, you told them who you expect them to be…and sandwiched in between two compliments an instruction manual on how you expect to be treated. After saying that with calm dignity you walk away without an argument. That’s it.
I hope today’s lesson is valuable to you one day 🙂 We all become demon-slayers – killing them with the shield of CPC kindness.
…Even with me trying to sound all tough and upbeat, I should warn you this post is going underground …and then through hell and back. Do you still want to get in? Strap in and sit tight!..
…Because today I am tackling the question of forgiveness. In full disclosure, I have spoken to my Ex today and we exchanged words. I did say that I am trying to forgive (not reconcile but just to let go) but I have incredible bitterness and anger left in me, and I am trying to work through them. You know what? Forgiveness isn’t easy. It’s not like you can snap your fingers and just forgive. It’s a process. I WANT to forgive and I will work on it but it will take time. The response was: “I’m sorry. I have nothing left to give. I am trying to become a better person”
… This confirms that simple fact, that you cannot be offended at the frog for not being able to read. If anything, the frog should be offended at YOU, for expecting it to do so. And yet its my own problem for staying with a person who wasn’t right for me, and I have to take full responsibility for denying the obvious. A rebel that I am, I stayed in a hurtful relationship despite what friends, family members, and the world around me, advised for years. And now I am left in the dust of my own failure. Now they can say, “I told you so”.
SO…YOU CANNOT DEMAND FROM A FISH TO FLY; AND FROM A BIRD TO SWIM; NOR FROM A PERSON WITHOUT HEART TO LOVE; NOR FROM A STUPID PERSON TO MAKE SMART DECISION. Every creature in the Universe requires its OWN approach. You wouldn’t treat a child with a Down syndrome like a normal child. And you would have higher demands on a normal child. Everyone has their capabilities. Once you start demanding from a creature something BEYOND THEIR CAPABILITIES, a crack can happen. A world would not end, but a crack in relationship and some damage from this disconnect between your brain and reality. For example if you thought a flame was a stream of cool refreshing water, you would burn your fingers. And if you offered a vegetarian some meat, you might hear a protest. The further beyond boundaries you push, the bigger the reaction. The same fish in the sky would just plop right back on the ground – the reality ALWAYS kicks you hard on the head, no matter the demands you have!
I have read several articles online about ‘forgiveness’ and Read the rest of this entry